I am so tired of this.
I'm trying so hard to be patient and to let this baby come in his own time, but that's about as effective as trying to sleep or trying to ignore all the well-intentioned pressure around me to go into labor already. The fact that I'm trying just means that I'm not actually doing any of those things.
The funny thing is that the longer I go with little-to-no-signs of impending labor, the more distant the reality of this baby is. It's like I might just be pregnant forever; never have to change a dirty diaper; never get to hold my sweet little boy. I'm going to spend eternity with a bowling ball-sized lump on my belly.
I think the worst part is that just keep having the same conversation with myself over and over. Be patient. He'll come when the time is right. It won't be too long now, and there's nothing you can do, so just keep your mind occupied with other things.
That works for about a half an hour while I go grocery shopping with my mom, or eat dinner, but inevitably my mind drifts, and I wish I was having a contraction or feeling my water break.
I just don't know what to do anymore.
I recently read that there are three stages this late in the pregnancy: ready, done, and miserable. I've been Ready for while, but I can feel myself rapidly approaching Done.
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