THEY SAY IT'S YOUR...well, you know the rest

Some pictures from my fantastic birthday bowling bash last night...
The Kings Bowling blacklit lanes


Summer, the Bowling Diva
Kevin and Crystal looking all cute

No, we just play siblings on stage
Men, acting tough
And again with the tough

No, offisher, I hurvn't been drinkin'
The whole crew.


I think our combined scores were less than 200, but we bowled our hearts out.

Thanks for a fantastic night, guys!

I think I'll have that glass of wine now...

Tomorrow I turn 27 years old.

Today I found my first grey hair.

It doesn't feel like a very fitting birthday present.

don't adjust your screens

We at The Wyrd Sisters would like to introduce you to our New Format.

New Format, meet the readers. Readers, meet New Format.

N.F. is a simple guy--not a whole lot of bells and whistles, but I think you'll grow to like him. We sure do. And now since we're tired of talking in third person, we will gracefully exit...

zombie children of the future

I have stumbled upon the most disturbing industry ever: Pageant Photo Retouching

These poor little girls... To take their cute, shining faces and smooth, cover, and enhance everything natural and human out of them. Maybe I'm naive, but I kind of like children to look like children. You know, instead of miniature ladies of the night.

One expert retoucher advertises "improvements" such as:
-Stray hairs removed
-Lashes added
-Eye liner added
-Facial powder added
-Skin blended
-Cheekbones defined
-"Doll Eyes" added
-Eye brows shaped
-Teeth straightened
-MOUTH REPLACED!

Here are a few samples of his work:
















Although, now that I think of it, this does pose some interesting possibilities for my headshots. With enough tweaking I could be made to look like Nicole Kidman or Natalie Portman. I'm sure that'd do wonders for my career--well, at least until I had to show up at auditions without enhanced cheekbones and major mouth reconstruction.

I supposed the next step (for me and these pageant beauties above) is to head straight to the plastic surgeon to manage all of those unphotogenic imperfections. So much easier than constantly having to retouch eyes that don't stare vacantly and lips that haven't been painted on.

moody blues

Let's just get this out in the open: I've been a crap blogger this week. There, I've said it. Can I let go of the guilt now? (I think I take way too much personal responsibility and feel way too much guilt in general. I'd say I was working on it, but that would be a lie, and I'd feel guilty for telling it.)

--A relevant anecdote from today: Thom and I were under-charged for a case of wine at Trader Joe's. When I discovered the mistake in the parking lot (charged for one bottle, not 12), I seriously considered thanking my lucky, cash-deficient stars and driving that puppy straight home...Like any normal human being would do, right? But no. I consider how guilty I'm going to feel whenever I open one of those pilfered bottles of wine--wondering who would have to pay for my greed. The sweet cashier girl? The manager of the store? The folks who pick the grapes? So, back we go into the store to correct the mistake.--

All of this is just to say I know I've owed you a Vegas update, and I feel genuinely bad for not writing before today.

The reason I haven't written sooner is because this has been a big-old, crappy, icky, stupidly-useless joke of a week. I came back from Vegas and I was tired, jet-lagged, and recovering from a few days of drinking and not sleeping. So instead of getting my affairs in order, you know, unpacking, checking email, following through on acting leads and such, I decided to avoid all that and redecorate my office.

It took two trips to Home Depot and three days of work, but the color of the walls is fantastic, and I love my new furniture arrangement. So that rocks. Yet still I have these looming piles of scripts I should read, mail I should respond to, and laundry I should do--funny how a fresh coat of paint didn't make all of that go away.

I'm hoping for a fresh start tomorrow--some time to go through all those backed-up emails and piles of paper. And once that's done, this weight of impending doom will hopefully lift from my shoulders and I'll be in a much better condition to recap what was truly a fantastic weekend.

For now I'm just trying to survive this insane bout of neurotic self-loathing

When did I turn into Woody Allen?

I feel like I've been hit by a mac truck

I've been in Vegas the past week to visit family and throw a bachelorette party. Still a bit jet lagged after my red eye last night, so I will give all the thrilling details tomorrow.

Viva Las Vegas!

close to the finish line

Not the One, the first feature-length film I worked on, is close to being finished. Check out the website and watch a completed scene of the movie. It looks great--I can't wait to see the finished product.

so wrong it's right

Since the Oscars rapidy approach I thought I'd share this little gem with you... Brokeback to the Future.