time warp

To quote another blogger I have neither the time nor inclination to look up, I have discovered two things this month:

• I can live my life
  
• I can write about my life

...but I may not be able to do both at the same time.

We have been blessed with a wonderful month of visits from family and friends, trips around town and out of town, great meals, concerts, tours, weddings, and lovely nights under the stars. I would love to share some details, but I need a moment to catch my breath. I know some of you faithfully check my blog everyday and I hate to disappoint you for a little longer, but writing may be scarce for the next little while.

Thanks for being patient with me.

xoxo,
Summer

Dr. Horrible's Sing-a-long Blog

For a few short hours you can watch this, the most awesome, thrilling, funny, poignant supervillain musical ever created free of charge. After that you can download it at itunes for under $6. Cool, huh?

So this girl walked into a blog...

So busy. No energy to write. Here is a photo from the 4th of July (before the month of company started). Isn't Finn cute? And doesn't River look pissed about the whole thing?

River News: Month Fifteen

Dear River,

You are changing so fast and in such significant ways, a blog post feels hardly weighty enough to document all that this month has brought. With a little more time on my hands I might hand-write your adventures on parchment, laminate the 20 or so stories therein, and collect them all in a book called The Amazing Things My Brilliant Son Can Do! Unfortunately, given how busy we have been as of late, you will have to live with this sad shadow of a re-telling. I hope you can cope.























First, let's talk about your WORDS. I know I've mentioned this in the past, but you definitely have some words now. I hear these regularly, and in the correct context, so I feel confident to say that YOU ARE TALKING. It's still sporadic, but some frequently used ones are mama (pronounced Ma-mom), dada, yea (pronounced like the Russian "Da"), and hi.

You're getting very good at communicating what you want--either verbally or with signs. We've taught you a few that you use often (more, milk, all done, hot, drink, eat, and water) but my favorite is the one you've made up yourself. To request something, you take your hands to your chest, twist back and forth, and give a huge smile. I didn't come up with it, so I don't have a direct translation, but depending on the context, it has meant: yummy, please, give, or nurse. One day you created this sign and now we see it all the time; I have no idea how it fell into your brain, but I'm so glad it did.



















Most of your signs seem to be related to eating, which is appropriate since we sit you down to roughly seven meals a day. That sounds like a lot, doesn't it? You don't always eat a lot at each sitting, but it's key to give you lots of opportunities to get food in your belly. Otherwise, my cute little River disappears and you turn into The Hunger Grouch. Picture the Cookie Monster crossed with Mama Alien, and you'll have some idea of what you're like when you get hungry.

This month you've made a big step in eating: using toddler utensils, plates, and cups! The mechanics of scooping and drinking are still tricky, but the speed at which you're learning is incredible. Still, when the fork is too slow, you often resort to shoving fistfuls of food--gooey peanut butter or juicy cherries--in by hand. Yesterday I watched you put four grapes into your mouth, only to fit two more on top of them. These are moments I question the wisdom of having your father feed you dinner every night. He is king of shove-it-in eating, and if it wasn't an inborn trait, you have definitely learned it from watching him.


















But if we're talking about modeling behavior, I have to admit responsibility for a few of your quirks. We know you like order, but now you seem to be under the impression that when it comes to the house, mom is in charge. About two weeks ago, you were downstairs with your dad and decided to do a load of laundry (you really do help--putting clothes in, taking them out, and pushing the buttons). We keep a bucket near the washing machine full of dirty washcloths, towels, River clothes, etc. You pulled the bucket to the washing machine and, with your dad's help, started to load it in. I told him to hold off on running it while I got some more of your clothes from your room. While I was upstairs, I heard your dad trying to explain something to you, "No, honey, don't put those away. We want to wash your shoes." Apparently, you found a pair of your shoes in the bucket and were trying to put them in the closet where they usually go. No amount of reassurance from your dad convinced you that those shoes belonged in that washer. As I headed back down I heard your father say, "Okay, ask your mom." You waited expectantly at the bottom of the stairs, disputed shoes in hand, and when I said, "It's okay, honey, we want to WASH those shoes," you made a bee-line for the machine and tossed them in.


















Does this story make my heart swell? Yes. I'll leave it at that.

When your cousin Sydney was two, she already had one chore: feeding the kitties. I know your dad is just waiting for the day when you can take the garbage out or mow the lawn, but I think we may aspire to Sydney's example. It has become part of our nightly ritual to feed the cats before we head up to your bath. You help with this by pulling the dry food out of the cabinet and handing us a can of wet food. Sometimes you need a little coaxing, but you've become unbelievably good and helping with this. I imagine by the end of the year, this job will be all your own.

Lest you think we're running a baby sweatshop (Iron those clothes Riverella! Clean out the litter!), we do engage in activities that are pure play. You love to dance, and you shake and wiggle when the spirit moves you. Usually you are inspired by a poppy song on the stereo, but it could just as well be The Cure or Death Cab that gets your booty shaking.























One activity that I'm very excited to encourage is your interest in coloring. Early this month we made a Father's Day poster for the grandpas, and you loved getting messy with the markers, creating lines and squiggles, and painting yourself in the process. A week after Father's Day had passed you had asked work on the poster for the twentieth time, so I decided you needed a permanent place to color. We got a little table and chairs, a roll of butcher paper, and some crayons, and now you sit down almost daily to do some art. You're still learning how to hold the crayons, and you seem to love taking them out and putting them away more than anything, but it's so fun to see that budding creativity in you.























Your grandma Julie (the librarian) will be very happy to hear that over the last few months you have developed a real love for books. Your only interest in books during your first year of life was to chew on them, so I was thrilled to realize you actually enjoy reading them together now! Often during the day, you will go to your bookshelf, pick out your favorite book of the week, and bring it to me to read. We sit together on the floor or in the rocking chair, and off we go into imagination land. Some books appeal to your sense of rhythm (Hand Hand Fingers Thumb), some appeal to your tactile stimulation (That's Not My Pirate!), and some appeal to your need to snuggle (Hug and I Like it When...). I love reading with you, watching the wheels turn as you connect pictures to words, and helping you begin a love affair with one of my favorite things.

There is one thing from this past month that I can't ignore and that is all the time we have spent outside. Summer is here! The weather is warm! And, this month, Mr. River, you have taken full advantage of the beautiful outdoors. We go to parks daily; sometimes we've made two or three trips by the time we plunk you into your bath at night. You love to be outside exploring, trying out your climbing or sliding skills, or wandering around the lot picking up abandoned pieces of trash to throw away. (That's right. You go out of your way to clean up after other people. When you are 15 and surrounded by teenage filth I will refer you to this paragraph and ask what the heck happened.)


















I'm thrilled that you're old enough this summer to play in the water outdoors. No more scuzzy YMCA pool for us! Between the kiddie pool we have in our yard, water features in the playgrounds we visit, and occasional trips to public pools, you spend time in the water almost every day. Usually I end up getting pretty soaked myself (though I'm not always planning on it), but the water calls to you and we must both answer.



















The advantage of spending so much time outside is that it let's you burn off the enormous energy you have buzzing through your body. You are a human super-nova: burn, burn, burn... and blackout.

Outdoor days yield good naps, and your momma chases good naps like a fashionista chases Manolos. You've recently added a step to our naptime routine that is just about ripping my heart out. After I set you in your crib, you snuggle in with Lou and Mr. Bear, I put the blanket over you, and you look up at me expectantly. You are waiting for me to a give you a wave goodbye. After you wave back, you smile, lay your head down and the ritual is complete.

After many, many years, when I have reached the end of my days, I hope that that is the last image I am blessed to see: my beautiful son smiling and waving me on.


















I love you my boy,
Mommy

the path I'm on...

Given a few years, I imagine I could have written this:

Out With the New and In With the Old

July 2, 2008 by Peripheral Vision

I have somehow declared buying new things to be completely frivolous and somewhat unhealthy. I’m not sure how this happened. It was partially due to Don trying to work freelance only (and making less money) - so that he and we as a family have more flexibility and time together.

But then, I recieved a few gift cards for for the holidays and went to try to use them. It actually made me sick to my stomach. I’ve gotten so use to shopping in thrift stores and really thinking about the consequences of mass producing plastic crap, that I just couldn’t buy something new. I know that I will buy things in the future and sometimes they may be new but I really feel such a consciousness every time I think of making a purchase. This can’t be bad.

This idea of buying things used and trying to make things as much as possible has gotten embedded into my psyche. I also want this to be a part of my daughter’s world too. She is a self proclaimed Target addict, so we try to no longer shop there. We shop in local thrift stores and yard sales - I love the idea of swapping what you no longer need for something that someone else no longer needs. Our entire house is made up of hand-me-downs and used but lovely items.

I have made all of my gifts this year. Sometimes this is hard. There are many people who don’t appreciate the handmade. I’ve been really trying to use recycled materials and found objects. Sometimes I make a trip to the fabric store or the art supply section but I’m really trying to make a difference in this over-produced, over-purchased, over-stuffed world of ours.

Besides we have so much shit already. Just keep me away from Ikea!

OCD? You decide.

I'm sitting on the living room floor at the end of a long day. River and mommy are both getting a special treat, relaxing in front of the tube, watching Bee Movie. He's mellow. I'm mellow. We're having a good time.

He wanders into the kitchen and pulls something out from a low drawer. With a proud smile on his face he plops into my lap and hands me a bag of Spicy Thai Cashews. Great, I think, too spicy and he can't have nuts anyway.

Instead of taking the treasured bag from him and eliciting a wail of protest, I walk back into the kitchen, explaining, "I'm sorry honey, those are too hot. Let me get you something else." I return with a bag of raisins, and the little scavenger looks pleased.

Instead of plopping back into my lap, he gets up with his bag of nuts, walks over to the drawer he got them out of, returns them, and comes back to me.

In no time we have big fistfuls of raisins, big smiles, and one awestruck mommy.

bedtime routine

If I was a River, I would...

• Stomp around the bathtub like Godzilla, crush my toys with monster feet, spread water far and wide, all while growling in Gremlin-speak.
• Jump around naked on mommy and daddy's bed--running and giggling as they attempt to latch a diaper to my wet butt.
• Make sure I wrap up the night with hugs and kisses from both of them, then talk to my critters (HaHaLouie and Bear) in a sweet, lilting voice as I pass out.
  

bring protection

The natural inclination is to view my cats with the same loving affection I afford my son--to see their little quirks and imperfections as unique elements of their personalities, not good or bad but simply them. This rose-colored view has become more difficult in the process of selling our house. Now we have to be concerned with the needs and sensitives of strangers, and that forces us to look at our cats' charming proclivities as, er, problems.

The cats are their own souls, completely singular. Edgar is a sweet, fat, lazy boy whose difficulty finding the litter box and anxious bowels create messy, unpleasant situations when you're asking people to come into your house, relax, and imagine it as their own.























Poe, on the other hand, loves NO ONE save mommy and daddy, and openly shows her displeasure at those who invade her space (i.e. any part of our house). She has been known to corner guests on top of their beds, to chase cleaning people and sitters around the kitchen island, hissing, baring claws, and generally scaring the wits out of them.

























So imagine coming to our open house: you walk in, notice the lovely floor plan, the beautiful windows, the great kitchen, and just as you are saying to yourself, "I could live here," you are greeted by an angry black cat ready to slice off your Achilles. You run frantically around the room, tour forgotten, trying to find a means of escape--a hissing, angry mass at your heels--and there at the door where salvation lies, you step into a wet puddle--or worse.

Good first impression, no?

So we decided to corral the kitties while we showed our home; first at the open house, then whenever needed as new appointments arose. This experiment did not go fantastically. We brought them over to our in-laws place just around the corner and thought they would find the familiar smells comforting. Not so much. They did fine while they were there (in spite of Poe's attempt to crawl into every small, dark space and Edgar's multiple attempts to mark his territory), but when we returned home they were both emotional wrecks. They hissed at each other, fought with us, and seemed to feel generally betrayed.

We have since had to evacuate them two more times (a private showing just before we sold and the inspection this weekend). The effect of these banishments have made them even more uneasy and off-kilter.

I had no idea how difficult it would be to simultaneously sell our house and keep the kitties happy, but I am so thankful that the process is nearly over with. Can you imagine if we hadn't sold in record time, if I was carting the cats away every day or two so buyers could look at a welcoming, pee-free house?

I can only say thank you thank you to the gods of cats and real estate.

fairy wings and unicorns

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River News: Month Fourteen

Dear River,

It's nearly two weeks past your 14 month birthday, and I am only now getting to this post. I'm sorry it's so late, but I know you'll forgive the tardiness because, hey, you won't be able to read this for another four or five years. This has just been a monster of a month for us, and in spite of all the chaos you have handled yourself beautifully. Let me give you an idea of what we've done during the past few weeks: searched for a new home, bought a new home, had endless meetings regarding the new home, packed up half of our possessions to clear the clutter, moved them out to storage, redecorated two bathrooms, prepared for an open house, traveled to Denver and back, lived through first your illness then mine, and finally--amazingly--sold our house after one day on the market. You maybe won't understand how much work that has been until you are yourself an adult trying to do these things all while caring for a one year old kid.























Your sitter, Anabel, who you spend three hours a day with, will be taking a two week vacation soon. When I first heard of this I was terrified. How am I going to handle the long long days without a break? I was sure I would be a crazy woman by the time your dad got home in the evening, exhausted, frustrated, and not pleasant to be around. But I gave it some real thought and I came up with this: you are such a pleasure to be around these days I don't think we'll have a problem at all. Looking back on this past month you have grown into such a great little boy--so patient, sweet, and helpful--and I think this time together, just you and mommy, will be really good for us. It's an opportunity to spend long days together, to go on outings to the museums, spend time in the kiddie pool, laugh and play together, and just enjoy each other's company.



















This month you have shown me what a joy toddlerhood can be--how exciting it is for you to have new skills and independence, how much more understanding you are of mommy and daddy's limitations, and how fun it is to teach you the skills you will need as you grow into a little boy. Here are some of the highlights from Month Fourteen:

You have discovered dancing! Your little friend Jackson introduced you to the concept, bouncing and bobbing his head whenever music came on, and now when you hear a tune you like you flap your arms, shake your hips, and do a little stepstepstep to the beat. Your momma spent many years as a dancer, training three times a week in ballet from the time she was ten until sixteen, so to see you take joy in moving your body is such a thrill for me. As you get older you will discover favorite songs and figure out your own unique way of moving, and I am so excited to see those days ahead of us.























Your dad and I talk about what activities we think you'll be interested in--will it be dance classes like mommy, soccer like dad, karate like your uncle, or something completely different? Based on what we've seen since the day you were born, I think it will be swimming. You are such a natural in the water, and you love every moment you have splashing around in the bath or playing with a sink full of water. This weekend you played in the neighbor's kiddie pool and you could not have been more happy. You jumped in and out of the pool with no fear, played with the water toys, and lounged on your back. You couldn't be more of a water baby unless you had fins and gills.

Some other things you've shown an interest in recently are throwing balls and dressing up. You get better at the former every day--throwing further and further every time you try. My favorite moment this month, however, was inspired by the latter. I was folding laundry one afternoon, and you jumped in as you sometimes do, trying to help me sort and organize. You landed on a pile of my underwear and were instantly intrigued. What is this? What could I do with this? Before I knew it, you had taken pair after pair and strung them around your neck! "Look mommy, pretty necklaces!" you seemed to say. I couldn't stop laughing and even took some video which I will play at your high school graduation or wedding reception.























You have an ever growing interest in big trucks and buses. Every time we pass one on the street you crane your neck to get a better look. You point and clap and show such joy at seeing these massive lumps of metal rumbling down the street. While we were in Denver at my cousin's house, we took a couple naps in a room that had been decorated for a child. The walls were decked out with a mural of cars driving down a long winding road and tracks carrying big trains. You'd barely be able to lay down, so excited to see the pretty artwork and let your imagination flow. And as soon as you woke, you jumped up instantly, so happy to discover that they were still there. It makes me think your next bedroom may have to have a similar mural on the wall. Who knows, maybe you'll be into dinosaurs next, but these days it's all about trucks.

This month you have come closer to saying some real words. By all accounts you have said them, but they were solitary performances, rarely to be repeated. In the correct context you have used these words so far: hi, here, woof, mooo (sounding like bvooo), dis, dat, mamama, and dadada. You are (and have always been) much more interested in improving your physical skills than your verbal ones, so it's exciting to see these little steps toward talking.


















As I mentioned before, we spent a long weekend in Denver visiting family. My aunt Candy had a birthday (Happy Birthday Candy!), my folks and some other aunts, uncles, and cousins came out to her daughter's home to celebrate. Since everyone is so spread out across the country, none of the extended family had met you yet, and I couldn't pass up the opportunity to introduce you.























You were such a hit! You latched onto the girls in an instant, charming them with your smiles and waves, bringing them presents like rocks and tupperware, and climbing in their laps for snuggles. You see pretty girls and are just compelled to flirt. I am so afraid of your teenage years.


















The boys in the family did not get as much attention, but overall you handled yourself amazingly well in strange new circumstances. You slept in your own (travel) bed, took great naps, played independently and with others, ate well, and generally let nothing phase you. The family was amused to discover that your favorite food (aside from any kind of berry) is guacamole. Your grandpa made a huge batch and you gobbled it down with vigor.


















I was really glad to see that your cousin Sydney took a new interest in you. I think she's very happy to have a new playmate, rather than a squishy blob that steals all the attention, as you were most of the first year of your life.


































We took a long hike in the foothills (much longer than anticipated due to some poor planning) and you slept in the backpack carrier most of the way. We went to downtown Boulder and shopped, stopped to get you a balloon mouse, and let you play in the outdoor sprinklers. (A little anecdote: after a much older boy kept kicking water in your face, I took a perverse delight in seeing him get sprayed right in the kisser later on. There is nothing like a mother's protective instinct.) Overall it was a fantastic trip, bookended by two flights in which you slept almost all the way home.








































These have been wonderful, if busy days, and I am just so excited to see you growing and thriving. You laugh so easily and seem to find joy in the smallest things. You're such a sociable little boy, waving at everyone you see, making connections with old friends and strangers alike. You are just an amazing and wonderful YOU.


















I love you my sweet boy,
Mommy

River News: Month Aaaaggghhh!!!

This post is really just to say how late the real post is going to be. We spent the weekend in Denver celebrating my aunt's birthday and introducing River to my mom's side of the family. Fantastic time. Imagine your favorite non-threatening '80s TV program (perhaps Our House or Family Ties) and you'll have a pretty accurate view of how we roll--sugary sweet, lots of hugs, and a valuable life lesson learned every so often.

We returned home this morning (5:30am, whoo hoo red-eyes!!) and were promptly slammed in the face with all the demands of buying a new home/selling an old one. We had two meetings at the new house today to decide some issues on wiring/drainage (can you hear the excitement in my voice?). I also booked some movers to come and haul away all of the random junk that won't be appealing to the potential buyers traipsing through our house THIS WEEKEND.

That's right, in addition to booking multiple contractors to do major work in the new house as soon as possible, we have less than a week to prepare for an open house.

River, I'm sorry this letter is going to be so late. Hopefully, over the next few days, I can carve out some time between packing up our crap and catching up on lost sleep to write all about the amazing changes you've experienced this month.

In the mean time, here's this to tide you over:

good times

We've been crazy busy the past few days. Between a mad dash to get our current condo ready to go on the market, searching for the best flooring, appliance, and soundproofing options for the new house, and some insane yard work (long story, perhaps you'll hear it later) we have had very little time to devote solely to Mr. Riverman. The poor guy has been carted here and there, sent on playdates with the neighbors, brought along for endless errands, pushed from activity to activity with little time to switch gears--AND YET, he has been an absolute prince about it all.

I have to say I'm loving this current toddler phase. I know that it's very likely, in fact it is a veritable certainty, that we have not seen the worst. Still, right now River's attitude is not only okay, it's fantastic.

Rather than get into a laundry list of all the great things he's doing lately, let me give you an example from yesterday: River had already spent the morning at the sitter's, endured a very long car ride, and sat through an hour and a half of mom and dad examining appliances. Normally this would be a recipe for disaster and we would try to get home as quickly as possible.

But it was getting late, none of us had eaten dinner, and faced with yet another change of venue or the twenty minute ride home, we chose to eat out. A few minutes later we found ourselves at the Cheesecake Factory and were told it would be a half an hour wait for a table. Hungry and tired, I was sure more waiting would push River over the edge. Rather than stand in the entry with all the other bored parents and kids we decided go out to the courtyard to let him wander around and get some fresh air.

Blasting through the patio sound system was a Counting Crows album, and just as I was thinking how cheesy and loud the music was, River started waving his arms. Shake shake! Shake shake! Turn and smile. Shake shake! He was dancing!

He heard the music, wanted to move, and found a great way to entertain himself (and all the folks eating outside). And only moments before, I feared we would have to pack it up and move on before he had a meltdown.

Dinner wasn't the easiest--he needed lots of time in mom or dad's lap, he picked at his food, he wanted to wander around--but still we had no tantrums, no food throwing, and no embarrassing scenes. In fact he charmed everyone who came within three feet of our table. He flirted with the waitress, waving and smiling, stopping just short of asking for her digits.

These little changes have made all the difference. I love his newfound independence, his patience, his growing inventiveness. I love that he is happy and we are happy... even when we're crazy busy.

tales of a button lover

One of River's latest interests is in buttons. He loves all kinds: buttons on the ice dispenser, buttons on the washing machine control panel, buttons on the automatic coffee maker. No alarm clock, elevator, or ATM machine can be passed without some attempt to push those ever so enticing buttons. I do let him push them when I can (after we've loaded the dishwasher, for instance) and hold him back when prudent (as he attempts to withdraw $100 from my bank account). But the one button he is most in love with these days is the Belly Button.

He is just obsessed. He attacks me four or five times a day--pulling up my shirt and examining my navel. He pokes at it and laughs as though it's the funniest thing he could have done. It was a grand day when he discovered his own belly button; the shock and joy that he too had a little inexplicable nubbin right on his tummy was overwhelming.

This afternoon he had a belly button jones and because of some restrictive clothing (damn those crotch snapped onesies!) he couldn't reach it. Try as he might, his undershirt wouldn't give him access to his tummy. He tugged and tugged and fussed and fussed until finally I stripped him down to his diaper, and then he had a grand ol' time--poke poke, giggle giggle. It was just about the cutest thing I've ever seen.

meant to be

Well, here it is my friends, after three months, a million viewings, and two failed offers, we now officially have new home.

Here, Thom checks out the new neighborhood while River rummages through a bag of books and toys we got from a yard sale (just what we need: more crap!).


















Cute street, huh? Still within walking distance of our favorite squares and Kevin and Crystal, so the location is great.

On Saturday we looked at a condo I had seen the day before, and though I thought it had potential Thom resolutely hated it (wow, sometimes we don't agree). I'm so glad he hated that place because it lead us right to our dream home.

While we were in the neighborhood, our agent thought we might like to see a house down the street that was in the process of being renovated. And when I say "in the process" what I mean is the house had been gutted and re-framed with studs... and that's it. We walked through the construction site armed only with a floor plan and our imaginations. Still, in spite of the exposed wires, plywood floors, and complete lack of walls, Thom and I both knew this was the place.

It's a four bedroom with a beautiful open plan, huge family room, and great backyard. And because it's so early in the construction process Thom and I will be able to have a hand in choosing everything from flooring to appliances to doorknobs (if we want).

We met with the developers yesterday--a lovely young couple who have quite a few houses under their belts--and we hit it off great. It was really important that we get along with them since we'll be working so closely together. They told us their ideas, we gave them some of ours, and at the end of the meeting we signed all the paperwork! It was so much nicer than the process we've been through twice before: giving our offer to our agent, staying awake all night wondering if they'll take it, only to find out the next day we've been out-bid by some crazy amount.

I'm thrilled and daunted by the prospect of designing a new space. It's going to be a lot of work in the coming months, but I'm always happy when I have a big project in front of me.

YEA!!

raising my own 40 year old virgin

We've had a very busy weekend gardening, house-hunting, and keeping River from imploding from his insane teething pain. I hope to have some fun news in the next couple days, but in the mean time I just wanted to let you know what a huge geek I am (and by extension, what amazing geek cred River is going to have):